28.3.16

Easter Monday, a day of relaxing, eating chocolate, sitting in the sunshine and watching the blossom on the trees, wouldn't you say?
I don't think so. Hurricane Kate blew in during the night and landed someones shed roof in my garden. And now I've been deposited at the hospital. And even more depressing,  I've been given a door side bed, not the window side bed. The miserable woman in the window bed likes to have the curtain pulled between us so i can't get any light. I shall make up for it by having the main room light on till midnight!
I have been attached to the evil bags. No. I need to be more positive. I have Six Platters (Cisplatin) running and Mankini (Mannitol) is nearly finished. I had a bag of Hydrangeas first (hydration). I believe the Six Terrapins (Citarabine) and Messy Bread (Methyl Pred) come later.
I have questioned how i will have the melted Cadbury chocolate administered. The charge nurse, Paul, has told me its via an enema. Thats not very friendly, is it? He's not entering into the spirit of Easter, in my opinion.
The HCA that came to do my 4 hourly obs was a darling. I had visitors at the time.
'Have you had your bowels open today?' she asked. Not embarrassed about being asked such a sensitive question, i replied,'yes thank you' with a smile on my face.
'What was it like?' she asked while thrusting a picture of all the different types of poo!
Then.......
'Whats your weight?'
So as to not shout out how fat i am, i showed her the figure that id written down on my pad earlier so i can compare tomorrow when I'm weighed again.
So instead of just type it into her little machine, she said it out loud, so everyone knows what a porker i am!
Damn steroids, and damn woman!
Miserable woman has been discharged so I've been shunted across to the window bed so I'm happy now, no more moaning and complaining from me....
OK, so I'm trying to enjoy my cup of tasteless weak black tea after my breakfast, in bed, watching Everybody Loves Raymond and I'm asked to get up so she can make my bed!
Come back later girlfriend!
One of the HCA's has got so much perfume on it makes me feel really sick!
The methyl prednisolone infusion that i have each afternoon makes my mouth taste bitter. All of a sudden i notice it come on, so i have to suck sweets. It wasn't like this the last time i had ESHAP! Its not nice at all. Such a strong bitter taste. Its obviously the cheaper brand! NHS cuts!
And thats me not moaning and complaining!
Been a very busy day here in this sprawling metropolis called Durlston Ward. Ive seen Sammy the specialist nurse who is going to take me to see the stem cell harvesting machine this afternoon. Im looking forward to that. T'will be very interesting.
Ive been told by Sammy that my tummy jabs that i have to have when i get home have to be between 9 and 10 in the evening so as to be perfect for when I'm harvested. Who'd have thought it had to be so precise?
Here she is. I have the blue one to remove my blue blood!

 

I asked loads of questions, as i normally do, nosey bugger, and i think i understand it a bit more.
Salvage chemo (ESHAP) hopefully gets me into remission. Then my stem cells* are taken after all the stimulating jabs*. Then I'm given BEAM* which should ensure the hl doesn't come back cos its soooooooo strong (hopefully, fingers crossed, and all that). but it kills off all my blood cells. In about 6 months my body would recover all my blood cell levels to normal,......if i were to survive in that time! Something would more than likely take me out with my bloods in that state. So therefore my stem cells are given to recover my bloods in a matter of weeks. Which answers my question of why do i need ESHAP if BEAM would do the job.
'There would be no stem cells to give you to save your blood levels, and therefore your life.'
During transplant time i have to be in isolation so i don't die! Sounds dramatic, but thats a fact. It sort of hits home a bit. If my stem cells went missing, I'm up the creek without a paddle.

*Stem cells are made in the bone marrow and they lay there quietly until needed.They mature into cells in bones, heart muscles, nerves, and other organs and tissue. In a transplant they are guided into becoming the cells that we need, i.e. blood cells.
*Stimulating jabs encourage my bone marrow to make loads more stem cells than normal. As a simple example, i needed to make 15 per amount of blood, and i made 400! Obviously in reality that would equate to millions.
*BEAM is the high intense chemo that will do its darnedest to cure me of cancer. ESHAP i hope will get me to remission, but it probably wouldn't keep me there. BEAM is the chemo everyone is scared of!
On that note i shall post this